Wednesday, October 12, 2005

Warning: This Blog May Cause Choking

I was watching T.V. last night when I saw a commercial for one of the many types of drugs that are now available to make our lives better, happier and healthier. This one began by telling you that there were no sexual side-effects. Whew, that's a load off my mind! But at the end we are informed that it may cause seizures. Well, as long as it doesn’t cause sexual side-effects, no worries. Do these people even HEAR what they’re telling us?

This led me to thinking of the many silly product warnings that I’ve read about such as the warning on a can of spray paint which passes on the useful hint: do not spray in face. How about the baby stroller that has the mind-boggling caution: remove child before folding? My favorite is the chainsaw warning which many men will appreciate: do not attempt to stop chain with your hands or genitals.

This, in turn, led me to wonder what dangers lurk in our game boxes? I know that people who love strategy games tend to be quite intelligent and not prone to doing incredibly stupid things, but could there possibly be some people out there who must be told the obvious? Some games may need a precautionary warning to prevent injury to the user or damage to the game itself, or to keep disillusionment to a minimum, which can also be the basis for frivolous lawsuits.

BLOKUS—pieces have sharp corners that could cause injury when thrown with great force..

SEA SIM—no fish were harmed in the making of this game.

PLUNDER—do not play with the boats in the bathtub.

THROUGH THE DESERT—the camels are not edible.

WALLENSTEIN—do not remove the ledges from the tower; pieces are supposed to get caught in there.

MAHARAJA—do not hit glass pieces with a hammer.

TRIAS—very small pieces which can cause breathing problems if inserted in the nose.

ROBORALLY—robots are not battery operated.

SHADOWS OVER CAMELOT—be careful when handling Excalibur; you’ll poke your eye out!

MEMOIR ’44, AXIS & ALLIES, war games of all sorts—parental guidance advised. Teenagers may become violent and go on a shooting spree, killing their family, friends and neighbors.

FORMULA DE and other race car games—do not play this game on the street.

MONKEYS ON THE MOON—NASA has found no evidence to prove that monkeys ever existed on the moon.

QUEEN’S NECKLACE—trying to pawn the necklace and rings will make you look like an ass.

Well, it was just a thought.

Contest Winners

My thanks to everyone who took the time to try my Name & Number Contest and for the compliments you gave me in your emails. Here is what was in the jar:

2 towers from Die Magier von Pangea
1 ship from Hansa
2 temples from Magna Grecia
15 fish from SeaSim (Ocean)
14 pieces (6 men & 8 ships) from Hellas
1 YINSH ring
3 trees from O Zoo le Mio
3 planes from World in War: Combined Arms 1939-1945
8 coins from Kontor
8 red camels from Desert Oasis (Oasis)
43 pieces (40 cubes & 3 dice) from Carolus Magnus
1 airplane from Screaming Eagles
2 place holders from Can’t Stop
30 Phoenix pieces
6 blue dinos from Trias
1 round, short piece from Quarto
4 knights from Torres
13 trains from Union Pacific
2 towers from Meridian
3 pieces (2 pieces & the crown) from Rosenkonig

Total of 162 pieces

The closest guess for total number of pieces was from Mr. Johnson. If you’re reading, I need to know your BGG name.

As for naming the 20 games, there were actually 4 people who got them all and many who got 18 or 19. Well done! The first to email me was Chad Krizan, who wins the 15 GG. Since everyone doesn’t read this blog at the same time, or have time to sit down immediately to puzzle out the answer, I’m giving 5 GG to the other three people with the 20 correct game names: Katie Harris, Morgan Dontanville and Kevin O’Brien.


Sunday I finally got to try Ta Yu with 3 players, one playing the bad guy who tries to thwart the efforts of the other 2. Richard, Chris (my son), and I thoroughly enjoyed the twist that the 3-player variant puts on the game.

We played twice so I got to taste the roles of both the bad guy and the good guy. It’s fun being the bad guy but I also felt the pressure to fight being the kingmaker. If both players are pretty much in an equal position and the piece you choose can harm either one, you must now choose which player to slow down. After the first game, Chris complained of his lack of choices so for the second game we played with one piece in hand, which I like better since you have some choice without being bogged down with TOO many options.

I’d like to get a chance to play the 4-player partnership game but I’m worried that it would be quite slow, though that can be just the thing you’re looking for if you’re in a chatty mood. Just for the record, I haven’t won a game of Ta Yu yet which means, of course, that we’ll just have to keep playing it!

Until next time, remember: chance favors the prepared mind.



Anonymous said...

Whenever I am shipping games via USPS, they always ask "Is anything in this package considered harmful or dangerous in any way?"

My answer is always the same "With a good attorney, anything is considered harmful."

Joe Gola said...

Whenever I see an ad for a new drug on TV I always imagine the announcer saying, "WE'RE ALMOST POSITIVE IT WON'T KILL YOU."

Anyway, the warning label frenzy has indeed spread to the gaming world. There's now a warning on the life preserver cards in Land Unter: "Caution: not a life-saving device; do not attempt to inflate." The German copies of Magna Grecia now have a big red sticker on the box that says "Warning! Do not look directly at board." Even the old family standard Monopoly has been affected by the trend. The fine print on the "You have won second prize in a beauty contest" card reads: "not an endorsement of actual beauty; does not qualify the holder for the semifinals in any regional or national beauty contest (exception: Tennessee)."

And, of course, the "Get Out of Jail Free" cards now says in big block letters: "NOT A VALID LEGAL DEFENSE (exception: Tennessee)."

huzonfirst said...

And, of course, all games of Alhambra come with the warning, "Do not play with six players--fossilization may result!"

GrillTech said...

Wow. Winning some GG and 2 weeks ago you gave me a link to my new online addiction (Puerto Rico). Thank you for the contest and all the great info you've passed on through your Blog.

BGG username is Pugwhan

Anonymous said...

Wow, some GG - very cool! Thanks!

-- cyberkev63-on-the-Geek