Monday, March 06, 2006


I had visions of this incredibly intelligent article I was going to write yesterday about board games. Every one of you would have been stunned by how clearly and correctly my razor-sharp mind dissected the entire genre of high-brow games. You would have admired me, of course, but the article would have been so well written that you would begin to glow yourselves, as you basked in the admiration that I subtley inserted in my paragraphs for you, the homo sapiens who have risen above the masses and become... homo novus gamerus.

I didn't write that article. That's because I was sicker than the proverbial dog all day Sunday. Plus, my latin sucks so bad that I have to resort to making stuff up that sounds latiny.

Here's what happened...

Saturday at about 1:30 in the afternoon I somehow managed to wedge JumboTron and his equally large brother Ro-bee into my truck. That may sound easy, it's a full-size truck with extra doors and everything. But apparently Dodge needs photos and dimensions of gamers to add into their computer modeling software when they design their next generation of trucks, it was a tight fit, at best. We then drove over the hill into the Boise area and spent until about 1am at fellow BGG member JohnnyBravo's house playing games. There were 11 or maybe even 12 people playing and it was a total blast. We got to meet another BGG member (Rickwa??) who everybody liked quite a bit because he not only wasn't annoying ~ which is a little suprising because he's a gamer and a tech nerd ~ but owns several games that we have only heard about here in Idaho. He's in like Flynn, that's for sure.

As the day progressed into evening the little cold I had got worse and worse. My nose was red, my lungs were filling up and I was miserable. But I soldiered on because I am a team player. Not to mention I actually won a game of Railroad Tycoon, which puts me at I think 4 or 5 wins out of about 30 or so plays. JohnnyBravo had traded for Santiago and that was played. It didn't suck as bad as I thought it would but I doubt it'll end up on my list of games to get.

The other thing I got roped into was Werewolf.

Okay, I want to be very clear about this. I really despise games like Werewolf. My contempt remains high even after three plays, but I will concede that the particular group of people playing made the experience enjoyable. I remain unconvinced that this is actually a game though. Werewolf is more like high school, a not-so-subtle verbal attack on everyone but you and those who you are pandering to at that particular moment.

By 1am I was beyond miserable and Jumbo, Ro-Bee and I re-inserted into the truck. As I was driving along a county road some headlights snapped on ahead of us and when I drove past them I saw it was a county sheriff.

Great. Earlier that day I had pulled the registration and insurance packet from my truck because I was looking online at some insurance quotes. In the rush to leave for the game day, I left the packet at home. And now, here we were, nearly 2am on a Saturday night, barrelling along a darkened road with a sheriff behind us, running my plate. I told the boys I'd probably get a ticket, at least for the missing papers and if the sheriff was a pissy little cop, he'd write me up for the 5mph over I was doing when we passed him.

Sure enough, he pulls me over. I grab my license and prep myself for the most propitiative and ingratiating demeanor I'm capable of and handed him my license when he got to the window. At that moment we all heard the crackle of his little lapel radio speaker and he spoke quickly into his mic and said "Three One".

And that was it. he never said a word to us. he handed me back my license and left.

One of these days I'm going to write a book about the dozens of times I have been stopped and not gotten a ticket. I get maybe one citation for every 15-20 stops. And yes, for some weird reason I get stopped a lot. Saturday night I knew it was because of Jumbo and Ro-Bee. I'm fairly certain the sheriff just caught a glimpse of this dark truck speeding by with these two huge hulk-like masses in it and he must have figured I was a PETA member who had just stolen two bears from the zoo and was heading out to turn them loose in the nearby wilderness.

So yesterday was a recovery day. And I might mention, for my fellow motorcycle racing fans, it was also the 2nd race in the World SuperBike series, held down at Phillip Island, south of Melbourne. The Aussies should be proud. Race one was taken by Troy Courser and Race two by Troy Bayliss. Both natives of Oz, both former World Champions and both very personable (and wealthy) people. My money this year is on the Brit, James Toseland. He's been the most consistent and now has the points lead due to Courser crashing in race two.

Okay, so there's my gaming, traffic stop and motorcycle report. Now that I think about it, the whole concept of homo novus gamerus is a little strange, so I'll pass on that and stick with what I know in the future. I plan to teach a few wargames to the current group I game with and that ought to provide me with an endless supply of laughs and blog ideas well into the summer.

One other thing... JumboTron bought a Chizo Rising starter and then contacted the Temple Games people because he wants to be the local "go to guy" for the game. He has convinced me that despite this game being collectible, that I'll like it. So when he gets more stuff later this week I am going to sit down and learn the game. I am skeptical. Not because I doubt the game is fun, but because collectible games just don't seem to work with me. If it's good, I'll let you know. If it sucks, I'll let you know. But what I did see of the game is very, very high quality.

Oh and one other thing... I was thinking of forming a support group for gamers who have failed miserably at understanding the Reef Encounter rules. Let me know if you're interested, perhaps we can all get together sometime, burn our copies of Reef Encounter and then publically riducule any gamers who claim they understand it.

Sounds like great summer fun.


Anonymous said...

once I got pulled over at 0015 for running a stop sign on a backwoods country road. The cop took about 35 minutes to run my plate. The whole time my wife and kids and our friends kids were speculating about why it was taking so long.

We were heading home from an amusement park and everyone was beat & full of pop & everyone had to pee. Finally the cop came back & handed me my info. He informed me that there was another guy in the state with my name & he was wanted for a double murder, armed robbery, car theft & having a tattoo. The cop couldn't figure out why this guy would have a bunch of kids in a minivan so he kept arguing with dispatch until he was able to clear us.

Didn't get the ticket. Thank God for smart cops.

Friendless said...

I volunteer to be ridiculed DW, you're funny enough that I would even enjoy personal attacks.

My one encounter with the law enforcement in the U.S. was in the backwoods of Wyoming when I crashed my hire car on icy roads. Where I come from, the only reason there would be ice on the road would be that I spilled my drink. The highway patrolman told me that he was going to fine me, and I could pay in cash on the spot if I wanted. Luckily I didn't have enough to keep him happy, because that humourless slimeball deserved nothing.

As for ChiZo Rising, it really scares me. There are 6 different base sets, and the boosters are for them all. That means that if you have only one base set, 5/6 of the cards in each booster are useless to you. What a scam that is! No doubt it will take off, stupid things always do.